Today's Menu:
Orange juice
brown rice and black beans
steamed broccoli
raw carrots
pink lady apple
pomegranate apple sauce
pomegranate
almonds
freeze dried pears
Going Deeper
I am working through Jentezen Franklin's books, Fasting and Fasting Journal. Today, it challenges me to discern what lessons God wants me to learn about endurance and asks: what dreams are in your heart that only God can make possible? These will be the topics of devotion and journalling but here are my surface thoughts, into which I will probe deeper during my time with God.
God is teaching me that endurance pays off. There are some things for which I have been asking God to do for DECADES. This fast is a personal challenge to believe and hope again enough to sacrifice and seek and by faith declare in my actions, attitudes, and words that delayed does not mean denied. Endurance for me means believing that God is not playing with me or teasing me. There are some things that I do not know God's answers for. I am waiting to hear about those. But there are some things for which I KNOW I heard him but it has been so long so I begin to think I was wrong. And yet, during this time of fasting and even a few days before it while I was preparing for it and getting my mind right, they began to bubble up from inside of me again.
At first, I was excited and then a bit hesitant. I hate disappointment. I hate expecting and it not coming through. I have had too many disappointments in these areas and wondered if it was worth it to endure or maybe....endure the fast for a different set of petitions and leave the old ones alone. You follow me? I'd do the fast even with a glad heart but just for something else. Then I knelt at the back of the sanctuary during the consecration service altar call to settle in on my requests for spiritual, financial, direction, and overcoming breakthrough and what I heard surprised me. God wanted me to pick up an old thing I was going to drop during this fast because it has been so long in coming I just wasn't going to waste anymore time and energy on it. I didn't hear this word but I guess it is what it comes down to: ENDURE.
Yesterday, as I was reading my morning scriptures, I read this: "No good thing does the Lord withhold from those who walk upright" (Ps. 84:11b). When I read it, I paused there. Circled back a few times, and underlined but I didn't really get what God was saying to me. I just knew He was telling me something, which is why I underlined it and figured I'd at some point get it. I got it: This fast will help me to walk upright. So keep walking, endure. The good thing(s) will come, He will not withhold it. I may be delayed, but probably only in my mind. Regardless, it is not denied and ultimately it will be right on time. Amen? AMEN!
Today was rough. I really wanted something to sink my teeth into. But instead, I gobbled down a huge bag of organic popcorn and now I’m feeling bloated - too much air I guess...
ReplyDeleteI wanted the fish option today. But since I had already decided at the onset of the fast that I would not do the fish option, I felt like I was playing a wild card - looking for an easy way out. I do not want to make any more concessions for my flesh. I did enough of that with the popcorn binge.
Fasting and working is starting to take its toll. Seems like my focus is divided. I just can't wait to have some time away from the rush and noise. The weekend is only one day away and I can't wait. I plan on shutting in no gym, no shopping, no movies, no nothing! I want to go deeper. I want to lay-out on the floor and cry out to God with no thought of time or having some where to be. I know what is lacking in my walk of faith and it seems like I keep missing the mark in this area. I need to press for it!
This fast is helping me to demonstrate to myself that I am serious about encountering God on a daily basis. Jeremiah 29:11 (the Message) states "I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out-plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I'll listen. When you come looking for me, you'll find me. Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else. I'll make sure you won't be disappointed."
ReplyDeleteThis fast has helped me thus far to focus on my relationship with Christ, the sacrifices He made and what He has called me to do. I don't ever want to leave the space I'm in now. I pray that when the fast is over & I go back to eating some of the things I've given up I can stay in this space I'm in now. Dancing My Prayers in the morning, spending time in devotion & worship is not something I have to give up when the fast is over. I'm gaining healthy eating habits that I can adopt as a lifestyle. Don't get me wrong, I am looking forward to eating a great piece of chicken Sept. 22 but I'll probably have a salad and whole wheat pasta and fruit instead of cookies. Its only day 4 and I pray I still feel the same way day 21. When I am serious about finding God on a daily basis, not just when I want something, I find him. I'm finally realizing that as I find Him daily what I'm asking for is not nearly as important as just being in His presence. I will endure and in the meantime just enjoy my 24 hour dance with Him.
Good day every one. I am feeling refreshed and determined today. I am having breakfast now: a green smoothie and a side of fresh spinach.
ReplyDeleteThanks Susan for sharing your testimony and the scripture. Whenever I hear you speak about dancing your prayers I am encouraged and began to wonder, "what is it that God has placed in my hand that I can use to communicate my worship and prayers to him."
I'm not a singer but I do know how to make a "joyful noise" unto the Lord.:) Excuse me while I make it loud up in here...
Have a blessed day everyone...
Well my meditation is going well. The Lord hasn't whispered yet but He has given me such a peace during the time that I spend with Him that just for today that is MORE than enough.
ReplyDeleteWhat resonates in my mind is PREPARATION, you see I am a Project Manager by profession and that is what we do "prepare"; so why is it that I procrastinate in so many other areas of my life. I haven't prepared a shopping list I just go to the store all "willy nilly", and when I get home I realize that I forgot something that I needed UGH!! Well I made a list for shopping today and tomorrow and I am going to follow it. Shopping for healthy foods is much different than going to the store and just going down aisle after aisle picking up things that I don't need. Now I stick to the other aisles where all the healthy good foods are.
I want to thank everyone who has shared on this blog because you have helped me look into my inner self and discover that I too have some of the same thoughts and I too do some of the same things that you do and that we are in some way the same just different outter shells.
Be blessed